It's not even noon yet, today, and here I am, waving my proverbial white flag.
I started the day off with so much intention and a long list of to-do's, only to be thwarted by a torrential downpour that was never even hinted at by our local meteorological gurus. They don't get paid the big bucks for nothing, right?? Sheesh.
As we waited patiently outside the grocery store for said downpour to pass, my (potty trained!) daughter squirmed around on my lap, repeatedly telling me that no, she did not have to go potty. An alarming stillness and warm sensation on my leg later, and it's official. I HAVE BEEN PEED ON. So out we go, into the rain, so I can deposit her back into her seat with a grocery bag tucked under her wet bottom for good measure. We were quite the pair, driving dejectedly back home- sopping wet, grumpy and on the verge of tears. One of us decided to suck her thumb for comfort and the other wondered why she didn't have a flask of something hidden in the car.
Back home (with absolutely zero groceries.. and did I mention friends are coming over for dinner tonight?? It might be a Bring Your Own Dinner dinner party), we hightailed it to the bath after Evie splashed around in the rain for a bit. I ignored the yelps of my poor, wet dog out back, because mama's only got two hands. Naturally, I had left him outside for our outing, because IT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO RAIN. Perfect. Once my girl was clean and cozy on the couch watching Mickey Mouse Something or Other, I took a deep breath and tried to relax. Still ignoring the dog staring at me from the back door. I lit a candle, rewarmed my half cup of coffee and unloaded the dishwasher. Just as I was starting to feel my blood pressure level off, I picked up my cup to take a healthy swig and looked down to see a DEAD FLY floating in my chai.
Sweet Baby Jesus, have mercy.
And so, with that, I am giving up on today. I am refusing to venture back out for groceries until the sun comes back out, I likely won't shower and my hubby may very likely have to serve our guests cold cereal tonight.
Oh wait. We don't have any milk.
Stick a fork in me.