Sunday, August 1, 2010

Dear Bob the Builder

Dear Builder Bob/Ronaldo/Kevin/Heffe/etc,

Thank you for building our house. I love it.

However, I have one little bone to pick with you.. (well, one for today, anyway).

I am sure you have a plethora of tools in that nifty little builder's toolbox of yours. Your mom probably adds to your collection every Christmas, birthday and President's Day. I am, however, wondering why you did not use your LEVEL to it's fullest advantage. It's a wonderful thing, the level.. It makes things like walls and floors and baseboards and moulding and trim, well, LEVEL. As in STRAIGHT.

Clearly it never crossed your mind that somewhere down the line, a hormonal pregnant gal might want to paint some sassy stripes on the walls of her baby girl's nursery. Clearly you have not yet had a wife in the throes of pregnant nesting.


Because if you had, Builder Bob/Ronaldo/Kevin/Heffe/etc, you would have made very sure that every wall, floor, baseboard, moulding and trim in every single room of this home, and especially any room that may at one point in time be used as a nursery, was LEVEL.

So in the future, dear Builder, I kindly request/advise/demand that you go a little OCD with the level. It can only help you and your future hopes of becoming a father and not having a roll of painters tape lobbed at your head.

Knocked Up Strange & Lovely


  1. If you find him, please have him come over to my house, too. I just noticed some very sightly, crooked light covers in my upstairs bathroom. At first I thought maybe my head was just tilted. No such luck.

    Dying to see Baby H's nursery!!!! Pics soon! It is going to be fabulous. You may become the next HGTV star.

  2. um...seriously loving this post! you are too funny~ ps--i am with ya girly--bob should be in big trouble!


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